Love Love Love This Piec...

Love love love this piece by @dankois. https://t.co/MnketnM0ua (View Tweet)

Though (I'm contractually obliged to add) he leaves out what I think is a big part of the story: the atomization & isolation that come w/ suburban living. The best kind of hangouts are the kind that just happen, but suburban living makes that impossible. https://t.co/avoFAKHwAI (View Tweet)

In that piece, I highlight what I found to be a fascinating fact. What do you think best predicts friendship between two people? A common background, origin, or ethnicity? Similar personalities? Shared values or interests or cultures? Nope. It's none of those. (View Tweet)

The No. 1 predictor of friendship is: propinquity. That is to say, the people we're most likely to make friends with are simply the people we repeatedly encounter. That's it. We tend to befriend whoever we have regular, spontaneous contact with. (View Tweet)

This is why so many people make lifelong friends (often their only lifelong friends) in college. Colleges are designed such that people run into one another -- in the cafeteria, on the way to class, in the dorm, whatever. Regular, spontaneous contact is built in. (View Tweet)

Now think about your average car-dependent suburb. You drive to work, you drive home. You drive to the store, you drive home. Who do you have regular, spontaneous encounters with? Starbucks baristas? (View Tweet)

To see people you know you have to plan it -- the calendars, the driving, the childcare. We have effectively designed propinquity out of our daily lives, and with it, the most fertile ground for friendship. And whaddya know, there's a loneliness epidemic. (View Tweet)